Which Lessons?

As parents, it's sometimes really hard to know which lessons we should teach our children. I want my girls to learn and to know so many things.

I want them to learn and understand the principles of the gospel. But more importantly, I want them to have their own experiences with those principles that will form strong, sturdy testimonies.

I want them to learn to have soft and humble hearts so they can be open to learning.

I want them to learn how to work. I mean really work. I want them to always be willing to get some dirt under their fingernails, to pitch in and help someone else in need, and to feel the sense of accomplishment that can only come after investing some sweat and hard labor.

I want them to learn how to study. I want them to love learning. I want the feeling of a "stretching mind" to be a familiar and welcome one.

I want them to learn how to work out differences and to appreciate differences. I want them to learn how to handle conflict in a constructive and mature way because ranting and slamming doors is ineffective and unattractive as an adult...I know because I do it all the time. And I want them to be better than I am.

I want them to learn how to organize their thoughts, their possessions, their priorities. I want them to learn about orderliness and to understand how it can make a difference for good in their lives.

I want them to learn about music. I want them to experience chills through their entire body when they hear a masterful performance, or perhaps when they present that masterful performance themselves.

I want them to learn to persevere. I want them to stick things out, even when they're hard; especially when they're hard. I want them to have confidence that they can conquer their mountains.

I want them to learn how to deal with fear. I want them to be excited to try new things. I want them to understand that they will grow as they confront the things they are afraid of. I want them to know they can get a dog and make it work, even if they've been afraid of dogs their entire life.

I want them to learn that life is not fair and to be okay with that.

I want them to learn about family. I want them to know my loved ones who have already passed and I want them to understand why we have families. I want them to be aware how being part of a family helps us grow and be better as individuals.

I want them to know that they are good enough. I want them to know that God made them the way they are because that's how He wants them to be. I want them to know that they don't have to excel at everything and to know that God wants us to have things to work on too - He gave everyone weaknesses and those don't have to define us at all.

I want them to know that it's okay to be alone. It's okay if friends move on. It's okay to stand alone if it means we're standing up for something we believe in. It's okay to go to a movie alone if there's no one to go with, and it sure beats staying home alone if that's not what they want to do.

I want them to get really good at something. I want them to push themselves hard to accomplish a goal.

I want them to learn how to get good at doing their own hair and to be self-motivated to brush their own teeth. It's not cool if mom has to give a message through a roommate to remind a daughter to shower.

I want them to learn to appreciate nature. I want them to feel close to the Creator of our beautiful earth when they hike in the mountains, stand in the sand near the ocean, or just sit on the patio one cool evening to watch the sunset.

I want them to learn to serve. I want them to seek after the good feeling that can only come after sacrificing something in order to bless someone else.

I want them to learn to obey. Not because they'll lose media privileges or have to live with a horrid consequence. I want them to obey because their heart wants to obey.

I want them to learn to be responsible. Responsible with money, with moral choices, with all of their stewardships.

I want them to learn so much and this list just scratches the surface. So what do I choose to teach today?

There are some things I just can't wait to teach my girls and to share with them, and all too often they don't seem to be in a spot where they are ready or where they are open to learning what I'm ready to teach.

Another hurdle to my desire to teach things to my girls is that each of my kids learns lessons differently and strangely, I'm learning that where one seems to have a great need, another seems to be okay. Turns out that when I work so hard to teach my girls important life lessons, I'm discovering more and more things I still lack and would like to learn myself.

With so many lessons for so many people in this house to learn, I can easily begin to feel overwhelmed. But I have to say that I am so grateful for my two knees that can bend in prayer and talk to the Father of us all - not only our Father, but also the Creator of our spirits and our bodies. The Creator who knows His creations. The Creator who gently leads me every day and helps me find ways to teach important things to my girls who He and I both love so much.

With His help, I know the lessons will be taught and the lessons will be learned. Maybe they'll learn a lot of great lessons from me, and maybe they'll learn them from someone else. Maybe I'll choose lessons to teach that will resonate with them from time to time, and maybe I'll discover unexpected opportunities to teach a principle. And I'm sure there will be more teaching-moment flops, but I'll just keep doing my best and loving the sweet girls He sent to me to take care of. Along each of their paths, they're learning the lessons they need to learn and I get to be the proud momma who walks beside them and beams with pride as I watch them grow up into beautiful young women and true daughters of God.