Anything Special?

Last night Leah sat on the arm of the sofa where I was sitting and asked, "Mom, is there any one thing you think is special about me?" I love it when my kids ask questions that are so easy to answer.

The hard part of the conversation came after we talked about a small sampling of the things that make her special when she said, "Well my teacher doesn't think I'm special at all." I held my words for a minute as I tried to make sense of what she was saying. I've had several conversations with Leah's school teacher and I know she adores the girl, so I knew we needed to get down to the root of her concern.

Come to find out, yesterday must have been a WOW Awards Assembly. A monthly assembly where each teacher gives awards to two kids in their class, whose names are then entered into a drawing for an iPod Shuffle. Leah is the kind of kid who will hold her breath all month and sit through the assembly with hopeful butterflies in her stomach, just praying that her name will be called. Apparently, she's been hopeful for one of these awards since last year, when even then her teacher "didn't recognize that there was anything special about me." I imagine she's left each WOW Awards Assembly a little more disappointed each time, and a little less encouraged that she might ever receive one. Even though she's the most positive, optimistic person I know, yesterday she must have reached her limit and she kind of hit bottom on this one.

YUCK. This is the stuff that conflicts me and makes me contradict myself. When my kids receive these kinds of awards and recognition, I love it. Yet, when my kid is the one who is overlooked, I detest this kind of stuff.

Being recognized for our good qualities or for making good choices can make us feel good or important. It's always nice when other people notice that we do something well. I get that. I just don't want my little Leah to be dependent on recognition from others in order to feel valued. I want my eight-year-old daughter to understand that she will recognize her value and her worth most significantly as she learns what it means to be a daughter of God.

I'm grateful for a loving and attentive Heavenly Father, who I had asked yesterday morning to help me know how to better connect with Leah. This was my opportunity and He gave me the words and the means to make our connection stronger as my favorite eight-year-old sweetheart curled up in a ball on my lap, cried some tears on my shoulder, and renewed some belief in herself.

After all the encouragement and words of love I could find, turns out one of her favorite things I told her was that if I were her teacher, I would give every single award, every single month to Leah.

Stupid awards...that is, until she receives one.